Well I am entering day 3 of my diet/detox/cleanse...call it whatever you want. In reality it is the "I don't get to eat what I want to and I want to pout like a child" meal plan.
Interesting things that have happened to me thus far:
1) My ass was on fire yesterday, I will spare you the details but just imagine what can happen when you start to detox and you consume herbal pills infused with hot and spicy cayenne pepper.
Side note: I love the way people use the word "infuse" and "infused" when they are talking about food and alcohol. Pay attention to this, it will make you laugh every time.
2) My step-dad has lost 9 pounds in three days! What!! Crazy, impossible? no, he has an insane metabolism, it drives me and mom my nuts. So if men can lose weight just by thinking about it, why don't we expect them to be slender and thin, and return by giving accolades for a fuller female shape? Let's mix things up people. Opposite of the hyper-metabolism syndrome that plagues my step-father is me and my 1.5 pound loss. Right now, as my aunt reads this, she is probably mentally drafting an email to me that states "Jacquie, I told you that you were not allowed to weigh yourself until you are done with this detox. You need to stick with the program and follow the rules." My mentally drafted response: "Aunt Lauren, it is not my fault...my mom is weighing herself too...get mad at her first!"
3) I went to a party last night. I had to endure the smell of fresh baked pizza and help my friend with the chocolate fountain...yeah, not tempting at all. My snap peas and broccoli really hit the spot. Don't you hate when people lie to you like that. "Oh I will pass on that fresh baked bread and French butter, I am really full from these veggies." LIE! You are either trying to make yourself look awesome, or you are trying to fool yourself into thinking that raw veggies taste as good as something that is actually awesome.
4) Some of my detox/cleanse products make me feel high. Yikes. Despite the ass-fire problem with the herbal pills, I have run into a conundrum with the natural electrolytes solution. Mid-way through my first day at work I noticed I felt a bit high and out of sorts...I had just finished a huge water bottle with my electrolyte solution...thus I name it the culprit. It is a weird solution, there are black specs in it. I think it may be sand...but whatever, I will take anything I can get these days.
Until tomorrow,
Signed hungry and cranky in San Diego.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Stay strong cuz. Well worth it. The best part is when you start craving whole, healthy foods as opposed to processed crap. Your body is used to craving a bunch of junk food to get the nutrients it needs out of the nutrient-less food on our grocery store shelves - so you'll feel like you are starving for a while. Google "thrive in 30". Anyway, looking forward to seeing how it goes for you!
ReplyDelete